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tried to get myself off in the shower today by fingering my prostate


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#1 Undercooked Sausage

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Posted 18 November 2008 - 08:32 PM

i was soaking wet naked in the shower and i thought about prostate stimulations i was like "whatever" rushed into the cabinet and pulled out a bottle of lube and lubed up my fingers and went to town in my ass with one hand while jerking my dick w/ the other i felt a small little thing in my rectum, felt like a grape or something which is what i heard they felt like fingered that for awhile and jerked my dick but didnt feel any difference so i gave up and jerked off the regular way, couple minutes later i had to take a shit and after i finished my dump i reached back in and the grape thing was gone definitely was just feeling my poop, fuck it all, where the fuck is my prostate
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#2 Montana

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Posted 18 November 2008 - 08:38 PM

i felt a small little thing in my rectum, felt like a grape or something which is what i heard they felt like




That was your tonsil.
Every Sunday morning I wake up
I see you by your dresser doing your make-up
Fluttering a Chinese fan in a Knoxville fashion
All last night you tossed and turned
Your body was hotter than the night Richmond burned
You say you had a bad nightmare about tractor trailers crashing
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#3 SonicAlligator

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Posted 18 November 2008 - 08:48 PM

hahahhahahahahhahahahhahahahahhahahahah
"Someone must be sleeping because all is quiet."
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#4 Sam

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Posted 18 November 2008 - 08:52 PM

this THIS is quality boarding. hahahahaha
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#5 pong

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Posted 18 November 2008 - 09:10 PM

In the long run it's the internet porn that did this to the poor kid.

#6 wakingrufus

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Posted 18 November 2008 - 09:49 PM

ew im never showering in the shower again.
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#7 Hans Christian Anderson

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Posted 19 November 2008 - 12:51 AM

i was soaking wet naked in the shower and i thought about prostate stimulations i was like "whatever"

rushed into the cabinet and pulled out a bottle of lube and lubed up my fingers and went to town in my ass with one hand while jerking my dick w/ the other

i felt a small little thing in my rectum, felt like a grape or something which is what i heard they felt like

fingered that for awhile and jerked my dick but didnt feel any difference so i gave up and jerked off the regular way, couple minutes later i had to take a shit and after i finished my dump i reached back in and the grape thing was gone

definitely was just feeling my poop, fuck it all, where the fuck is my prostate



post of the century

#8 mouthbreather

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Posted 19 November 2008 - 04:35 PM

oversharing!

#9 Agrimorfee

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Posted 19 November 2008 - 04:56 PM

i was soaking wet naked in the shower and i thought about prostate stimulations i was like "whatever"

rushed into the cabinet and pulled out a bottle of lube and lubed up my fingers and went to town in my ass with one hand while jerking my dick w/ the other

i felt a small little thing in my rectum, felt like a grape or something which is what i heard they felt like

fingered that for awhile and jerked my dick but didnt feel any difference so i gave up and jerked off the regular way, couple minutes later i had to take a shit and after i finished my dump i reached back in and the grape thing was gone

definitely was just feeling my poop, fuck it all, where the fuck is my prostate


Bolded portion opens the door to so many responses of equally poor taste, which adds to the bravura of this little story. :lol:

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#10 nobodies

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Posted 19 November 2008 - 05:31 PM

i was soaking wet naked in the shower and i thought about prostate stimulations i was like "whatever"

rushed into the cabinet and pulled out a bottle of lube and lubed up my fingers and went to town in my ass with one hand while jerking my dick w/ the other

i felt a small little thing in my rectum, felt like a grape or something which is what i heard they felt like

fingered that for awhile and jerked my dick but didnt feel any difference so i gave up and jerked off the regular way, couple minutes later i had to take a shit and after i finished my dump i reached back in and the grape thing was gone

definitely was just feeling my poop, fuck it all, where the fuck is my prostate


Follow these simple instructions next time:

(1) lay down on your bed, legs up in the air spread eagle;

(2) Get your middle finger and ring finger on your left hand nice and lubed (this is assuming you're right handed. Flip-flop if you're left handed);

(3) slowly slide your middle and ring fingers into your ass. Go knuckle deep so it looks like you're giving your bunghole the sign of the devil;

(4) start working your middle and ring finger in a "come hither" motion. This is the massage action your prostate is looking for;

(5) jerk your schfanz with your right hand;

(6) cum and repeat.