WELCOME TO SOMB MADNESS 2007

It's back, it's bigger, and it's just as inane and inexplicable as ever. The main changes from last year, for those of you familiar with the tourney:


* We've expanded the field to 128 teams. (100 automatic berths and 28 at-large invites.)
* To handle the doubled workload and to keep the thing lively, there will be four judges this year, each of whom will handle an individual region. I'll announce the judging of the final four as we approach it.
* More things factored into seeding than just one's post count, though it often factored heavily.
* HERE'S THE BIG ONE: Instead of judging your most recent post at a random time, the judge will select the best of your last five posts for the matchup.


Now that the brackets are set, we'll do two rounds a week. Starting TUESDAY THE 13TH AT NOON CENTRAL, we'll take a matchup, quote the best of your five most recent post from either "team", and pick a winner based on the posts, often out of context. As in most impartially judged contests, there will be much controversy, including much wailing and gnashing of teeth. Whining is, as ever, highly encouraged.

Quality of posts decides each game. Of course, that can include one or more of a number of factors:

well-reasoned
funny
timely
zing factor
trash talk
lack of: "cheers, janine", references to Floyd, insipid IM transcripts, a bulleted or numbered list of five, creepy board nostalgia, AF lyrics, or Mark Smith photos, among others.

Board hard. Board well.

And good luck. Now, the regional lineups:

SUFJAN STEVENS REGION
regional judge: geoneb

First Round Matchups:

1 Undercooked Sausage ..........................Undercooked Sausage 98, captnblackjack 83
32 captnblackjack

16 Hans Christian Anderson
17 Paul....................................................Paul 67, Hans Christian Anderson 42

9 Freddie Freelance..................................Freddie Freelance 98, Burzum 47
24 Burzum

8 elcorazon
25 dano....................................................dano 76, elcorazon 44

5 Hewletts Daughter..................................Hewletts Daughter 107, el douche 78
28 el douche

12 Artem
21 girl with aspirin......................................girlwithaspirin 67, artem 56

13 held......................................................Held 78, Hero 61
20 Hero

4 jasmine..................................................jasmine 58, CoolerByTheLake 55
29 CoolerByTheLake

3 DrJimmy.................................................DrJimmy 92, vurt 42
30 vurt

14 Jess......................................................Jess 67, new bedlam 64
19 new bedlam

11 NumberTenOx shampoosuicide........shampoosuicide 67, Midnite_Vulture 62 (OT)
22 Midnite_Vulture

6 velocity...................................................Velocity 72, Musicgurl 47
27 musicgurl

7 agrimorfee
26 cerebralcaustic........................................cerebralcaustic 78, agrimorfee 66

10 TKB IV- Terry Kath's Brain!.....................TKB IV--Terry Kath's Brain! 58, MattDrufke 47
23 MattDrufke

15 MattW
18 Vivian Darkbloom...................................Pavement Ist Trad 75, _jon 55

31 _jon
2 Pavement Ist Rad...................................Vivian Darkbloom 70, MattW 57

DON HENLEY REGION
regional judge: Undercooked Sausage

First Round Matchups:

1 Some Girl
32 Diesel ................................................Diesel 98, Some Girl 89

16 tweed
17 nobodies.............................................Nobodies 49 Tweed 37(!?)

9 no magnets
24 Mr. Sinistro.........................................Mr. Sinistro who cares No Magnets who gives a fuck

8 Elemeno P.T........................................Elemeno P.T. 76 Particlehustler 68
25 ParticleHustler

5 solace
28 Binko.................................................Binko 76 Solace 23

12 BobtheSquid
21 Wolfgang...........................................Wolfgang 52 BobTheSquid 48

13 Cinnamon Pooter................................Cinnamon Pooter 53, Chrono 51
20 Chrono

4 Biggie McSmalls..................................Biggie McSmalls 1,000,069 Danse Avec Moi 58
29 danse avec moi

3 Slackmo ............................................Slackmo 92 Zolacolby 56
30 zolacolby

14 tattoo
19 Efrim.................................................Efrim 81, Tattoo 13

11 le chaton
22 castana.............................................Castana: 89. Le Chaton: 88

6 Montana
27 kilgore trout ......................................Kilgore Trout 54, Montana 37

7 ryan...................................................Ryan 68 Amotin 45
26 amotin

10 Seamus
23 Duff...................................................Duff. 104, Seamus 0

15 rudayo
18 beansimpson......................................Beansimpson 56 Rudayo 50

31 Tracy Jacks
2 The Good Dr Bill..................................Good Dr. Bill 56 Tracy Jacks 42

Why did you explain it all? That'll take the fun watching confused newbies inadvertantly win rounds!

Oh well, let the games begin!

Can I ask for my five to be not including any run down entries of the movie countdown, if possible please.

Not a problem.

sadly the write up for Big could beat quite a few people's posts

1 [djdee] Thanks
2 [djdee] a
3 [damo] lot
4 [djdee] for
5 [damo] that














Cheers,

JAY FERGUSON REGION
regional judge: thrillho (aneg)

First Round Matchups:

1 coolrock................................Coolrock 1, AFTERSHOCK RIP
32 AFTERSHOCK

16 birdistheword............................birdistheword 45, Andyroo 44
17 Andyroo

9 avec
24 Bleep Blop................................Bleep Blop 110, avec 109 (2 OT)

8 Marlon Brando...........................Marlon Brando 65, More Drama 56
25 More Drama

5 SkinnyHips................................SkinnyHips 89, Breugel 82
28 Breugel

12 Bhickman
21 UselessRocker................................Useless Rocker 79, BHickman 32

13 Jigga................................Jigga 55, Tony - 49
20 Tony

4 red.............red 32, Johnny Bravo 31
29 Johnny Bravo

3 yancy RadioHitchcock
30 ladytron: the tv series .............ladytron: the tv series 77, RadioHitchcock 55

14 THRSLVR
19 norton....................................Norton 93, THRSLVR 80

11 Rob Gordon
22 geoneb............................................geoneb 63, Rob Gordon 31

6 undo................................undo 96, Abortion Angel 54
27 Abortion Angel

7 AlkalineDrown
26 john the cool kid................................john the cool kid 104, AlkalineDrown 39

10 mouthbreather..................................Mouth Breather 5, Kessler 1.3
23 kessler

15 theremin...........................................theremin 3002, ben 17
18 Ben

31 Jordan
2 cantstopwontstop................................cantstopwontstop 76, Jordan 54

i know you don't allow DIII posters into your tournament, but somebody named Abortion Angel got in ahead of me?

Alright, if you're gonna go ahead and include me despite my wishes, at least seed me over fucking Deej. I mean, c'mon. This is an insult of a mockery of a sham of a travesty of a miscarriage of justice.

most Vegas odds makers have this guy as the odds on favorite to win the whole thing

The Selection Committee did not spend twelve days in a bunker picking the at-large teams. Each of the four regional heads selected seven teams from below the top 100 poster threshold. I believe the AA inclusion had much to do with the hope that this particular poster would return to his former Jerkass form. (Though if that were true they would be a much higher seed.)

If this went on last year, I was completely oblivious.
Now I'm only partially oblivious.

The whole wanting-to-be-out-of-the-tourney thing tends to take care of itself. But it also accounts for lower seeding.

Nah, fuck that. Either leave me out or rank me above the bridesmaids.

ANDREW GOLD REGION
regional judge: Slackmo

First Round Matchups:

1 MitchellStirling......................Mitchell Stirling 69, raumschwein 52
32 raumschwein

16 Sid Hartha
17 Bob Loblaw......................Bob Loblaw 59, Sid Hartha 51

9 sin city......................sin city 75, crease 58(?)
24 crease

8 Alan......................Alan 83, wh1tep0ny 58
25 wh1tep0ny

5 kmac..............................kmac 61, LA Mat 12
28 la mat

12 worrywort......................worrywort 45, tylerdurden74 41
21 tylerdurden74

13 WesterMats
20 Nick...............................Nick 11, WesterMats 8

4 thrillho (aneg).................thrillho 38d, bestseventeenyearoldever 16oz
29 bestseventeenyearoldever

3 Saskadelphia
30 philoctetes...............................philoctetes 83, Saskadelphia 79


14 Rocks And Blows
19 dice ...............................dice 64, Rocks And Blows 59

11 Pinkerton
22 feisty..............................feisty 63, Pinkerton 55

6 elastico............................elastico 73, Bobzilla 58
27 Bobzilla

7 simakos............................simakos 88, BGwaves 22
26 BGwaves

10 scarymuppet....................scarymuppet 48, ginNY 25
23 ginNY

15 Complain.........................Complain 75, The Luscious Phil 58(?)
18 The Luscious Phil

31 Music Saves......................Music Saves 68, firefly 44
2 Firefly

sin city vs crease should be good.

edit: oh, and what's that four next to my name mean? i'm not familiar with how this stuff works.

Hey retard: take me out of your tourney.

Oh, if AA is Jerkass then I'm all for the inclusion.
I didn't realize the Bobby Knight-like entertainment factor behind that pick.

For fuck's sake.

I'm still trying to set the over/under on how many of Sausage's decisions will end in fatalities.

Who is this?

hmmm, intelligent political analysis vs. big-ass chocolate titties....





it's in the bag.

I'm gonna fuggin Bleep Blop all over this region. Take your hats off gentlemen.

I don't even know who this cocksucker is.
I'm OJ to her Nicole

wtf? chill out ya crybabay

I just asked to be left out, is all. Didn't work. [shrug]

Power went to his head.

Yancy's an early candidate for first-team All-Tourney honors. Leave him alone.

Should have been a Sadowski region.

Yancy, just make a bunch of shit posts and you'll be out lickety-split.

Uh no, you acted like a 9 year old picked last for little league. Do you need a hug?

Business as usual, then.

All that "GIVE IT BACK" nonsense, and not a peep of acknowledgment of the fact that not only is our boy geoneb back, but you wound up in his bracket. You're welcome, 8 year old.



I love when you pre-empt the easily-teed-off ones. You almost seem self-deprecating.

sorry, i didn't read that shit you posted. Yay geo!

Yancy's team has been ruled ineligible due to violations of the tourney's staunch anti-gambling policy. Graciously, RadioHitchcock has stepped in, though at a heinously overrated #3 seed.

In many ways, the ANDREW GOLD Region is a Sadowski region.

big shoes to fill, like marky mark in Invicible.

Dang...128 teams...I went from a Cinderella to a mid-major...

Matchups that should be fun:

6 velocity
27 musicgurl

8 Elemeno P.T.
25 ParticleHustler - could be the dark horse of the entire tourny

11 le chaton
22 castana

8 Alan
25 wh1tep0ny

And it cracks me up that I'm not in the same region as SomeGirl...I figured that was a mortal lock.

One more available slot in the tourney, to be filled by the first to volunteer for it here. Thanks.

might as well give somebody a first round bye.
count me in.

You'll be taking the place of the esteemed NumberTenOx, who has left for the world of professional jai alai, thereby forsaking his amateur status. Welcome to the monkey house.

I feel like the Oregon Ducks being placed in the East Region. Jay Ferguson? Do I know this man? In the end, it doesn't matter. I just thank the good Lord I've been given this opportunity to compete. THRSLVR is a worthy opponent. It's worth noting that his name also looks great on his license plate.

Yeah, that was one story line I neglected when parsing out the brackets. Maybe it will be the incentive you need to try to make the final four.

Nice call on all of those matchups, especially the velocity/musicgurl matchup. Jury's still out on whether they're the same person, anyway.

Alan vs. whitepony = most one-sided match ever

I beg to differ

1 Undercooked Sausage
32 captnblackjack

Haha, the proof of that would be in the pudding--or moelleux as the case may be--so don't tell me there's a baking component in the first round...

More Batavian on Batavian violence. When will we learn? Lord, how long?

Yeah...I'm screwed already. Particle Hustler is a lethal sleeper. Looks like another one and done for P.T.. I'm thinking of going down easy by making my next five posts rants about how much I detest minced and highly seasoned pork meat which has not been adequately sauteed.

No, but there will be a swimsuit competition