Sufjan Stevens Region Round 1: 4. jasmine vs. 29. CoolerByTheLake





jasmine borrows a page from the sausage playbook and posts a list of swears. It's enough to take a first half lead, but in the second half CBTL comes back with an insult to those heterosexual males (such as myself) who enjoy the music of Justin Timberlake. He makes it close, but jasmine goes on a 7-0 run at the end of the game to narrowly pull this one out.

jasmine 58, CoolerByTheLake 55


Second Round SS matchups:
1. Undercooked Sausage
17. Paul

9. Freddie Freelance
25. dano

5. Hewletts Daughter
21. girl with aspirin

4. jasmine
13. held

3. DrJimmy
14. Jess

6. velocity
11. shampoosuicide

10. TKB IV--Terry Kath's Brain!
26. cerebralcaustic

2. Pavement Ist Trad
18. Vivian Darkbloom

you gave cbtl 55 points for sub-montana garbage? guh

Who wants to explain the "point system" to Deej?

How many matchups are left? Does this still end tonight?

Deej, do you have a personal setting other than "shrieking nance"?

Thanks, organizers, for including this occasional boarder in the competition. With the pressure off, I can now sit back and enjoy this high quality thread (geoneb's wan wrap-up of my bracket game notwithstanding).

Now that I'm a legal resident of Canada, my posts will only grow more tedious and irrelevant, but I promise that no-one will board with more half-interested infrequency than me.

...than I?

They speak the Queen's English up there in Canadia, don't they? You better shit your get together.

Oh, shit. Vivian. What's up with me being matched up with underappreciated posters whom I respect the hell out of? Shit.

And let's face it, if your thread has over 400 replies, there's bound to be some fellatio gifs in there.

EDIT: Also, sometimes in this forum you forget that the front page thread you're posting in is not called "Ass," "Cock," "Breasts," "I'm horny today," "The internet has desensitized me completely," "Compulsive Posting Topic," etc.

I'll do the rest of mine tomorrow afternoon/night, whenever i have time. Unfortunately SOMB madness started on my spring break, which is the only time in the year where I have stuff resembling a social life.

Duff I love you, but don't think the same tactic will work everytime, just stick with your typically stellar boarding.

Yeah, I kinda figured, but it was relevant (though hideously, hideously late due to drawing taking a stupid amount of time to do). I was thinking of posting one where I rip a guys heart out instead, but whatever. Gimmicks ain't gonna get you far here.

BRING ON ROUND TWO!!!

Use of "than" as a preposition has become the norm in Canada as opposed to the (endangered, if not extinct) conjunctive treatment. Just as it is in the States, the use of "than me" is far more widespread--and certainly idiomatic--up here. I'm pretty squared up on grammar, but thanks anyway.

'shrieking nance' = yr reaction to justin timberlake threatening yr masculinity

Well, well. If it isn't the #5 seed. You know, anyone I talk to on SOMB says, "Oh, that Hewletts Daughter, he's such a nice guy!" Lucky for me: Nice guys finish last.

Excellent second round material.

i dnt gt it.

This will be one for the ages, youngster. I'm already combing the interweb for suitable GIFs of interracial fellatio and endlessly bouncing Asian boobies.

You'll be hard pressed to find any he hasn't worn out five years ago.

I'm slightly innebriated, so it sounds like a good idea to do some matches!

Don Henley Round One. 3. Slackmo vs. 30. Zolacolby







Look, I need to take a shit so I'll keep this short and sweet. (beer shits, is there anything greater?) Here we have two mild-mannered soldiers fresh from combat. Strokings their precious egos and sucking the life forces out of any teenaged soul or astute south african warlord that comes near them. Built for combat, brazen in their conquest and bloodlust. They are true, red-blooded americans, i love them both deeply and want both of their tender, juicy bodies to advance to the next round, but it ain't gonna happen! I'm about to tell you why in five easy steps.

1. Have you ever seen
2. Arrested Development? Good show, great, even, in the third season, there's a character named Bob Loblaw, it's hard to say. Let me cut to the chase, it's a pretty great post, whatever way you slice it. Meanwhile, Zoloftcolby is beating off gingerly while Yancy sits in his condo and feels zolo's warm cum inbetween his massive, succulent buttcheeks. Homoeroticism be damned, ZOLO is a gladiator, not a gay man! He is no Kev! No alkalinedrown(grats on the engagement man, see you at the wedding!)! He is a gladiator built for combat like the members of Star Fox or even Tuxedo-Mask from the hit cartoon jackoff anime, Sailor Moon, hot naked teenage high school sluts fighting for their short skirts and something. I only watched a couple episodes and rememeber there was a cat who sounded like an old lady.

Anyone looking forward to the new Spider-man 3? Let me put it this way, Peter Parker is Slackmo, and Harry Osborn is Zolacolby.




ownt


Slackmo 92 Zolacolby 56

I'd feel better about this if it didn't look like Spidey is fellating his friend in the last frame.

Particle's still hustling his way through this, no ? Recognize!!!

We really need a an ESPN-style link with full brackets and up-to-the-minute scores and highlights.

Note to my regional: I've been waiting for the first round to finish before starting the second round; however, i may not get to posting until Wednesday due to an assload of work over the next few days. I hope to get the second round done before I leave for Florida next week.
~geo

Yeah, the official word right now is that both of the other regionals will wrap up the first round tonight and tomorrow, and the 2nd round for everyone will start on Tuesday. If you're buried with work I can definitely knock yours out, or I can solicit some more help. That way you can get your work done and none of the matchups will get short shrift.

The good news is that I'm really only buried in work until tommorrow (everything is due on Tuesday because fine arts kids are leaving for tours of Japan and Scandanavia as well as other kids leaving early for Puerto Vallarta/Florida/Springfield), so I can do matchups on Tuesday if need be. However, I am leaving for Florida myself next Sunday and won't be back until the following Thursday, so I may need help then. Thanks for the offer though.

I think the message board has finally gone post modern.

It terms of self awareness this board has always been postmodern. The favorite topic of the SOMB is the SOMB itself.

Am I even part of this? I hadn't paid attention beyond the first day or so this thread was started.

EDIT: Bah, looks like my Earth comments knocked me out in the first round, and my Opeth/Niles Crane comment was the equivalent of running the table at the NIT. Too little, too late. Once I fire Tubby Smith, I'll be ready for next year's tourney.

Fuck, I lose

Sausage>>>William S. Burroughs and Hunter S. Thompson

Dude is so cut-up, he promises 5 steps and gives you only two (one of them only a sentence fragment.) God, I want him to write a novel.

Jay Ferguson Region Round One: 6. undo vs. 27. Abortion Angel




There is a lot to like about Undo. He's a comprehensive poster, a smart fellow and, so I've heard, incredibly handsome and verile. Abortion Angel, on the other hand, well, we don't know much about him. his spastic plays and unwieldy manner leaves many of us a tad afraid of him, but intrigued as well? He's definitely a wild card and, were he not up against the absolute juggernaut, known as undo, he might have taken this thing. But he won't. Because undo's post is so fucking brilliantly his. You look at an undo post, and you know it is by undo. That is really something to be respected. Were you to take a look at a random posting by Abortion Angel, you could posit it were, like, William Tell, or Hickman off his meds or even a tamed Real Guest. Entertaining, thoroughly, but undo is a star, baby. A STAR.

undo 96, Abortion Angel 54

score should have been closer
Abortion was robbed

oh please. undo is a master.

Not on that post
you should have awarded the match to the guy that thought that Subway needed a drive thru

googlechat

aneg: undo, i'm about to judge your madness match

undo: oh. ok

aneg: you wanna post anything new?

undo: naw

undo: hey, just use that Subway post I made yesterday.

aneg: yeah, it really doesn't matter, you're going t owin anyway, haha

undo: yeah

that post had everything great about undo. the only thing it was missing was a snarky comment. which was replaced about his over identifying with a local restaurant. which i find cute and funny. song lyrics, an uploaded song. accuracy. way to go, undo.

jess, stop being a cunt.

Why would anyone in their right mind want Undo to lose his first round.

nice to see the judges are unbiased [/snarky emoticon]

yea, we are totally bias because someone made a BETTER POST than someone else. dumbhead.

One judge saying he wants a particular person to win shows bias.
Another judge informing a contestant they are about to be judged shows bias.

Like you, I calls 'em how I sees 'em

I'm ragging, fuck you

You spelled "venal" wrong, dumbass.

Don Henley Region Round One 15. Rudayo Vs. 18. Beansimpson










beansimpson




Rudayo




Beansimpson uses Razor Leaf



Instead of retaliating, rudayo poses on a rock for some reason



Beansimpson poses in a forest.




Rudayo ejaculates wildly.




Beansimpson shoots some beam thing out of his, uh. Corn chute.



Rudayo is blown away and his meat is sent to hell where a bunch of Spartans proceed to eat him. THE END

Beansimpson 56 Rudayo 50

1 for 1,077. That's more like it.

can we make it a law to never ever use that phrase. ever. thanks.


actually, i spelled "stacked" wrong.

undo has awesome tits.

dude! we're not even in the same region dumbass- less we both meet in the final four.
better save yer energy duffy-san

The fuck we don't. He's only the legendary jerkass, ignorant judge. I could understand maybe pushing undo through to round two just on seniority against a faceless nobody, but you betta bring real game to beat jerkass. He was ROBBED.

but will we ever really *know* jerkass....?

Shit. Jerkass is one of the all-time legends of the SOMB.

No offense bean but CONTROVERSY!!!!!