So I got myself in to a slight pickle with the editor at the Southtown just now and need a way to weasel out of this unharmed.

Basically two months ago, I said I would review a 311 show that happened to be this past Tuesday night. The night of the show came and went and I pretty much forgot all about it and wound up not doing said review.

Then yesterday morning she emailed me and asked if I would be willing to review 311's show this upcoming Sunday. I knew full-well that they were, in fact, not playing anywhere near Illinois Sunday, so to cover my ass, I said "yeah, I said I'd review that show a while back, so I'm all game!" so that I looked good in the situation when, in fact, I had no intention on going to any concert Sunday and writing any review. Plan made sense in my mind.

And then today it backfired.

She then emailed me today telling me that she made a mistake and she meant Three Doors Down and not 311. She apparently got confused by the excessive THREEs coming through Tinley Park this week.

Now, I don't want to review this show at all. Would it be rude if I email her back and just say 'hey, I have a deepseeded hatred for Three Doors Down, so no" or is that an ok thing to do? BEcause I think it's what I am going to do. I don't want to see Three Doors Down. Fuck that shit.

Do it! Wear a wifebeater and sing along with sarcastic passion to the songs you wish you didn't know. Kryptonite!!!

Then write a review so scathing that the Southtown never calls you again.

this could be the beginning of my 'angsty' writing period phase

i just wrote a video game review the other night so biting that towards the end, i actually wrote that i wanted to punch the developers of the game in the face for what they've brought upon this world

fuck you Deadliest Catch, the video game

One time the Southtown printed the biggest, craziest photo ever of me playing field hockey the day after our opening game and for that I will never forgive them.

Oh My God,
Post of the year right there, wear your earplugs. I didn't even know those bands were still around.

really?

why? what makes you give taht distinction to me for that lowly, and utterly dull look in to my life?

i appreciate the compliment(?) but just don't understand.

HEwlett's, just go to the show and write an honest review ripping them to shreds... aren't you allowed to write negative reviews?

They printed the worst photo of me stuffing my face with pancakes. No, not stuffing my face so much as just sitting there and looking down like an idiot.

There were links on the website if you want to buy a t-shirt of coffee mug with any of the pictures they had on their site. I should have gone for it.

Tell her that if you cover the show you can guarantee the review will be scathing. Nothing rude about that, and if she has a problem with it she'll take you off the assignment.

I can write all the negative reviews I want. My second review for the Southtown ever actually was a negative one on someone (maybe Kelly Clarkson?) and she actually commended me for not being afraid to criticize the show and finding flaws other than the Tweeter Midwest World's soundsystem is a piece of garbage.

But the fact of the matter is I don't want to stick around Tinley until like 930/10 at night only to have to get back to Chicago and write a review hours before my flight to New York on Monday. I'd rather take Sunday to be like Christ and relax some. Because that's what Christ does/did one Sundays. He relaxed.


Yeah, I think that is going to pretty much my plan of attack. She's pretty cool about most things, so I'm not too afraid that if I tell her that I just hate the band too much, I think she'd understand. Maybe I'll make an elaborate story up about why I hate them. Or maybe I'll just say 'hey, I hate this band and will rip the mercilessly apart without even giving them a chacne because sometimes I'm just not very open minded." Oh, have I mentioned I'm not getting paid for these reviews? Because if I haven't mentioned it, well, I'm not getting paid for these.

Plus her emailt o me was more or less a question if I'll review it. Not a statement declaring I must review it. So there. Derek's got his out.

Suck on that shit, Southtown Economist.

So another coworker and I decided we’re going to start leaving rotten peaches on another coworkers desk every night until she stops saying, “Oh, I’m just peachy!” every time she answers the god damn phone. She also likes to say “Awesome!” There is something about 50 year old women saying “Awesome!” that drives me insane. [/rant]

This is Thursday, so High Dive.

I can't find the pictures of Red's feet.

I never posted the pic here. It’s only on my flickr page. Do you like feet too, Freddie?

I just met a friend for lunch and she said she was just on the elevator with a guy who kept staring at her feet. Eventually he said, “Hmm, you have nice feet: well kept, no corns or bunions.” Then as she was walking out of the elevator he said, “The heels are nice too, no cracks, cuts or blisters.” Who does that? Especially to a stranger.

Don't make me come over there red--what words and phrases are you going to cut out of your vocabulary just because you're 40? 50? Age is a state of mind.

Sorry, sweetpea. You're right. I think it more has to do with her tone. I feel like she's trying to be hip. And she's just all around annoying as hell.

PUMP UP THE VOLUME
PUMP UP THE VOLUME
DANCE
DANCE

I do this and don't see it as any weirder than complimenting a person's jacket or tie.

I especially notice & comment on a woman's choice of footwear. My eyes naturally go down toward a woman's feet when she walks by. Its the first thing I notice as I am quite interested in women's feet and footwear.

I don't know, Damo. I really can't picture you saying. "Your feet look great. No bunions or blisters!" Had he just said, "You have pretty feet," "Those are great shoes," or something like that it might have been a little less weird.

I wasn't there so all I can say about it is that it really made her uncomfortable.

Well, I am not saying I use his exact wording. Usually, "Cute shoes" or "Pretty feet" or some variation of is my response.

The point being there is nothing at all wrong with taking notice of a woman's well kept feet or her taste in footwear.

Fashion is Terrorism.

Man, I love Bret Easton Ellis.

Why the fuck does the Fox PM news come across with the exact same tone as the morning "LOL WE'RE NOT SERIOUS NEWZ" programs do?

i dont see anything about PMs

you'd think with all the Sexo Urbano I've been watching that i would improve my spanish. that is not the case.

derek asking the tough questions

why does 78 degrees feel cold all of a sudden when in spring i was hot in 60 degree weather? summer makes no sense

It's all relative I guess.

I need help with #24 and #41.

At night, the ice weasels come.

That's how I met my wife. I complimented her on her shoes. Always classy, chicks love their goddamn shoes.

The missus knows about my foot fetish and she asked me during an advert for foot cream if I was getting aroused. I'm all "LOLNO".

Classy is a very stranger word.

at first i thought that was a picture of me that i'd never seen before

then i saw the tattoo and realized otherwise

still

spoooooooky

I thought the same thing.

It was not fun to wake up this morning.

Number 24 seems to say that an "old" topic will really be ancient.

41 is quite simple, this is not funny:

DESU! DESU! DESU! DESU! DESU! DESU! DESU! DESU! DESU! DESU! DESU! DESU! DESU! DESU! DESU! DESU! DESU! DESU! DESU! DESU! DESU! DESU!

Guys with foot fetishes are so easy. All we have to do is dangle a shoe from our toes while sitting cross legged and you guys get excited.

So that's not Derek? Weird.

it's definitely not Derek

i have better hair than that schlub, i don't allow photography of my vomiting, and i don't have that tattoo!

still, it's a spitting body double of me, in'it?

Yesterday seemed like a Friday to me. WTF am I working on a Saturday?

I need live music, someone get me out of this Surburbia hell hole....oh yeah, I'm seeing Lyle Lovett and his Large Band at Ravinia on Saturday. Me and a 20,00 other tools drinking Syrah and eating fucking Brie on crackers. How gay am I? I might be the only person there high as a kite.

Perhaps your parents never told you the tale of your twin they gave up at birth. They thought he was the evil twin.

I have to give a presentation in 18 minutes on a G&A report that someone else prepared AND I only got 4.5 hours of sleep last night. This is going to suck.

Pfft, you say that like it's a bad thing!

Your presentation will go well. The worst comes to the worst, you never prepared it, so it's not your fault.
Of course, that's easy for me to say, I've only ever had one office job and I was fired on the third day.

oh my... can you post a pic?

There're Foot, Shoe, Leg & Shoe Dangling fetishists that'll all go for that, and since there's only a couple guys out of 10,000 with any of those you'll want to go with the combo to maximize the tantalized (yes, there are Shoe Dangling specific fetishists, just google "Shoe Dangle").

nah...all of the high schoolers from LF, HP, Deerfield, New Trier, etc will be right there with ya!

i have zero motivation to work on this manuscript.

Omg, I had no idea a Fannie May Mint Meltaway Eli's cheescake existed.


This is now #1 on my to-do list. Beats out the Gap closeout clearance at Stratford Square mall.

There used to be an Ice Cream place down in Manteno that'd make you a Eli's Cheesecake Malted: fresh made, hand scooped Ice Cream, Whole Milk, Syrup(s) of your choice, Malted Milk Powder, and a Slice of Eli's Cheesecake. Incredibly thick & rich.

That sounds like the greatest thing ever.

No Sleepytime Gorilla Museum fans here? Yer missing out.

http://www.chillow.com/chillow.html

anyone?