Anything that doesn't involve prostitution or selling drugs would be prefered.

Assemble flat box furniture (IKEA type shit). $35 hour.

Sign up for medical trials.

sell your eggs.

read craigslists etc often.

Have sex with me.

get a fucking job.

i saw on the news you can get up to 25,000 for a kidney. do it up.

Where is this?

At an IKEA store?




Is this something you have done?




I think that's what he's trying to do.

Run lights in a nightclub.

When I first started, I was pulling in something like, $95 a night. I'd work (if you can call it that) about 4 nights a week and you do the math.

Stick with it, get good at it, and you could pull in something like $500-1000 a night running lightshows in clubs. Granted, you gotta be in the right club, but the money is out there. Believe it. I'm running lights the next 4 nights and you really don't want to know how much money they're paying me to do so. But it's a fuck of a lot more than $500 a month or $95 a night.

Do you need any background knowledge for this? If not, I am interested and want this job now please.

there was a kid that worked in my office (briefly) that said he had been making high 5 figures annually the past couple years playing online poker

me? i think i've figured out a way to do the same in stocks working half an hour a day

yeah, you need start capitol for both of those. online poker is nice because if you only play really good hands you will still win. if you are actually gonna play its still kinda gambling but there are paterns to learn. as for stocks, they are a little tricky to learn as I am doing now so after this summer I can actually invest with about 3000 bucks or so.

I just snagged a telemarket job, 4 days a week, 5.5 hour days, about 650 a month or so. look for telemarket jobs, they usually pay 7-10 an hour cause they are so shitty.

yeah, and who is the right person you have to know to get a job like that?

Just run an ad on Craigslist and watch your mailbox fill up. Most people hate putting that stuff together and will gladly pay someone to do it for them. The normal rate where I live is $35/hour with a two hour minimum and I've seen some people charging $45/hour. Most of these guys are so busy they have to turn business away. It helps if you live in a college town with an IKEA located nearby as nearly every student goes and buys a desk and bed that needs to be put together.

College kids pay to have a desk assembled? I bet there's a ton of IKEA crap bought in DC. Show me what a money ad looks like, plz. I'd totally do this on weekends after I get my thesis out.

They also pay to have them taken apart when they move.

Holy cow. No more one subway sandwich a day diet. I gotta do this. Or maybe I could get off the piggyback put it toward legitimate internet access.

35 an hour?

I can get a mexican guy to do my shit for less.

(I'm mexican)

Hot college chicks and sorority babes don't let mexican dudes from the Home Depot parking lot into their bedrooms.



At least not most of them.

are you my boyfriend #1? kid got rich off of playing around with stocks.

p.s. kinetic (andy, no not andy a sentence up lol, (nevermind)), honestly, just fuck around on craigslist. craigslist= santa claus. ask and you shall receive. for realz.

What was his input v. output?

Does SG remember the true reason for the season?I'm pretty sure that line belongs to this guy.

i dunno, but he's going to help me make more of my money. i told you i date guys who are useful to me. plus, hot.

his dayjob is with a bank, trading their money all day. the other day he was bummed 'cuz his partner fucked up. i was like "how?" "we lost a few million, i'll gain it back tomorrow." i was like "wtf!"

goddamn jewish people and their knowing about $[/stereotype]


no. ?

and then traded up for a different girlfriend?

no. he's #1 on my heirarchy of beaus. not a joke.

re: ben
oh yeah, jesus, him, drrrr...

yeah, i actually would've guessed that given that your heirarchy is stacked according to net worth

as for the #1 on MY heirarchy of beaus:

no, not at all 'cuz i don't plan on marrying, nor even looking to marry anytime soon. i had no idea about his job at first. but i'm not surprised, he carried himself well.

You might want to have this same talk with the boy before you bring him home to daddy.

Although I can't help but wonder if this whole Catholicism thing is going to stick about as well the whole monogamy thing. They do sort of pray to the same god, so to speak, don't they?

good one!

oh, i should have clarified... not until i'm like 32. then three babies within the 5 years after that.

enough! back to scheming for mr. android...

could you be more specific?

yes, fall. spring is too cliche.

har har...

Get 500 beer/pop cans and fart in each one, seal the fart in the can, and then auction them off to greedy warlords for a dollar each who are yearning to unlock the secret of fart.

What about gringos from the SOMB?







He'l trade you for someone younger...




...before you are 32, then you'll have to settle for some bum and then your ovaries won't cooperate.

Competition is tough in your line of work. I imagine there are more light and sound people than there are clubs for them to work in. Supply > demand. Giving out tips to up and coming youngsters is only going to help spell your professional demise.


Heh, are you borrowing a neighbor's wireless signal or something?

I'm running an unsecure wireless connection as we speak. Neightbors could have free high speed cable internet if they only knew. They're all at least 70 years old, though, so I'm guessing that's not happening.


Some guys pay for cakes that have been farted on by girls, or so I've read.

This was actually a few years ago when this issue was first brought to my attention, but unfortunately my current research on the subject comes up with nothing.

Ha. Actually I'm at the local sports bar leeching off them for the moment. I'm here to watch the White Sox opener. But, yeah, when I'm at home I'm on some neighbors unsecured network. It's 25 Mbps!

He used to post those adverts in various usenet groups (like rmak-x).

Get a summer job at DeKalb County Highway Department. Tell 'em I sent ya...

Lighting operator job description - starting out, you must be able to :

• count to 8 in time with the music, and then press a button
• understand the difference between intro / verse 1 / chorus 1 / verse 2 / chorus 2 / bridge / chrous 3 / outro of a song
• like music
• like being in nightclubs
• like making lights blink around the room on beat with music

Chances are all the lighting controllers you'll be using at first will be in small bars, with really simple gear. Usually a box with 16 buttons or so, maybe a few faders, and possibly a joystick. The lights will probably be simple as well, like strobes, pinspots, moonflowers and such. These are basically one-effect lights that only need to be turned on or off with the music. These days, there might be a chance of finding a bar with "intelligent" lights, but those will also be pretty basic so don't worry. And you can always download manuals for pretty much any gadget to get you up to speed.

My first club, I was both DJ and lighting operator. 'Twas a small bar in Joliet that held, like, 300 people. But it was a lot of fun, and my lightshow was pretty much a row of on/off switches. In fact, the first night we didn't have the switches installed so I had a ton of labeled extension cables that I was plugging in + out of a power strip as the music changed.

Now, as to how to get the job : yeah, that's tricky. The advice I was given at first was to simply hang out a few places that you liked, that already had cool music and some lights. Hang out a lot, get to know people, get to know the DJ + lighting guy, watch them work, and generally insinuate your way into the club. Go to a lot of clubs, too - just to see what others are doing. Let people know your interests, and the people who become your friends will keep an eye out for opportunites for you.

I got my first club in 2 weeks. It was basically a small place that had maybe 100 people tops on a Saturday. I'd been DJing private parties for years and was looking for a room to have some fun with, so I met some people there (including my wife) and the owner, and the manager - all of whom were really nice, relatively broke people. I knew I could whip their room into something special and profitable, so I approached them with my services + a mix tape that was composed of music they were already playing, just blended together in a much more "club" style. They loved it, and offered me a whopping $50 to DJ Thursdays, and there was no money available to rearrange the room. I took it, and optimized the lighting and sound on my own time to get more oomph out of the system. Within a week I was given all the nights the club was open and all private parties and $75 a night. The club got packed within weeks, that summer I was a minor sensation in Joliet, and after about 3 months a few people from the Chicago club scene (and Wax Trax records - I was mixing industrial among the pop songs back then) came out and offered me some work in the Windy City...

I'm thinking of a summer job in a toll booth. Wouldn't that be awesome??? That or Barnes & Noble, which is two minutes from my place.

Thanks, L. I had managed to forget about that.

wear a hospital mask. toll booth operators have one of the lowest life expectancies

how is a mask going to help when a semi comes barreling into you?

The secret is White Castles & Beer, I thought everyone knew that one.

MKA, how about Fetish? No sex, no touching, still big bucks. I'm sure there's someone on this board who could help you get into it. Paging Stella...

worst kept secret in the history of the board?

if you are going to wait for those hands, you better hope you get called because you will lose more money wasting them on the blinds over and over. and if you play no hands ever and raise all in out of no where, you should get no calls. unless that table is full of retarded people or better hands.