I'd love to see your sausage, Sausage to the Extreme *wink, wink*



It's a joke.

you're well sexy, i love your voice, gruff like a woman with a deep voice. can i be the cat to your dog?

Hi. Do you want to go out with me? My mom says I gotta be home by eight though, so it'd be great if you showed me your cooter before then.

I want a date. The problem is my dad said he can only drive me on Friday night. Otherwise maybe my parole officer can drive me another day.

Sidetrack: I heard this uttered by a girl once when I picked her up. Shortest date in history. I might as well just have driven her around the block.. alright, back to yer flirtin'

Would you like to go to the prom?
I promise I won't bring my mom.

I'm choosing the restaurant for the date. What do you prefer Chuck E Cheese or McDonald's?

Would you like to go out to dinner sometime? after that we i can show you my star trek stuff.

I have lots of money. Any questions?

Suck my shit and then kiss me.

You don't sweat much for a fat girl.

I used to be a man, now I'm a woman. *looks down pants* Well, almost a woman, does that count?

"You are so fucking hot. I want to get some coke. Hire a hooker. Just get crazy."

Let's make like Nike and 'just do it'.

I promise we can snuggle afterward...

(so which one of us is Wayne Brady?)

pinkerton's february 13th:

girl: he doesn't want anything to do with me anymore, which is ok because i'm sick of putting up with his shit. tomorrow is gonna suuuuuuuuuck...

me: (!) well, we should do something tomorrow, then. i don't wanna spend valentine's sitting around by myself, either. i can get reservations at hamilton's

girl: oh, well my mom's making cakes and i have to help her and my brother's coming over...

me: jesus, fine. leave me alone then.

girl: wait, i'm sorry!

me: you're ridiculous *click*

no wonder the ladies loooooove me.

"I can smell your cunt!"

"I lost my number. Can I borrow yours?"

"What's your hat size? No, I'm not buying you a hat for Easter. I just want to know if your head will fit in my freezer."

"I'd fuck anything that moves!"

bump

lol@SOMBies flirting with Ace

so much potential, so little fulfilled.